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what do single people do - franklinkelsey5 - 09-28-2025
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Article about what do single people do:
| Psyche Ideas
More people than ever are going solo. We identified a gender difference that hints at the ingredients needed to enjoy it
Is being single a happier experience for women or men? is a PhD student at the University of Toronto studying singlehood and wellbeing.
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She examines how individual characteristics, such as personality and gender, as well as broader factors – including culture and geographical region – play a role in shaping singles’ lives. is professor of psychology at the University of Toronto. His research centres on wellbeing in singlehood and romantic relationships. is a PhD student at the University of Toronto studying singlehood and wellbeing. She examines how individual characteristics, such as personality and gender, as well as broader factors – including culture and geographical region – play a role in shaping singles’ lives. is professor of psychology at the University of Toronto. His research centres on wellbeing in singlehood and romantic relationships. More people than ever are going solo. We identified a gender difference that hints at the ingredients needed to enjoy it. ‘You’ll be single for the rest of your life’ is the sort of foreboding comment that has long been directed at single people. But increasingly, they seem to be asking themselves whether ending up single is a threat or a promise. Data show that, in some places, singles comprise around 40 per cent or more of the adult population, and research suggests that a good portion of these people are intentionally choosing singlehood over relationships. Who is particularly likely to feel that singlehood works well for them? There is reason to think it would depend partly on gender. Historically, women have faced strict expectations when it comes to romantic relationships. In many cultures, women’s perceived worth has depended on their desire and ability to marry, while men’s worth has been based more on their ability to succeed financially. Women who hesitate to marry have traditionally been thought of as odd or selfish, the common assumption being that they will get with the programme and become dutiful wives and mothers. Single women continue to be subject to cultural stereotypes such as the lonely cat lady or the miserable spinster, someone who is shunned because of her inability – or, even worse, her unwillingness – to marry. Attacks on single women are also institutional. For example, a governmental body in China created the term ‘leftover women’, and single women in China are explicitly blamed in the news for China’s failing birth rates. But the rising tide of singlehood seems to be emboldening people to notice and question this kind of denigration. A recent and relatively radical example in South Korea is the 4B movement, which marks single women taking a stance against relationships, marriage and sex with men. Beyond all the insults and the pushback lie some empirical questions: how are single women actually faring, and how do their experiences compare with those of single men? Single women were less interested in having a romantic partner than single men were. Researchers have started to dig into this, but the small body of work that had been conducted until recently did not provide a clear consensus on whether men or women are happier in singlehood. In our research lab, we strive to understand who is more or less happy in singlehood, and why, by asking single people questions about how happy they are in different parts of their lives – for example, how much they like being single, or what their sex life is like. Previously, researchers have found that samples of single men and women were no different in terms of their satisfaction with their lives or their singlehood. Yet some other research has suggested that single women might be happier with their lives and their singlehood. Most of this research did not ask about how much people wanted a romantic partner, leaving untested assumptions about what single women and men want in their lives. In a recent study, we surveyed nearly 6,000 singles – one of the largest and most diverse groups yet examined on the topic of gender and singlehood. Here, we define singles as those who are not currently in a romantic relationship. The singles were from different countries around the world, including the United States, Mexico, the United Kingdom and Poland, ranged in age from 18 to 75, and were required to have been single for at least six months. We asked them to report their gender, and got them to answer a few well-researched and validated questions about happiness. What we found was that, on average, single women were happier than single men. Among our respondents, 32 per cent of single women (but only 20 per cent of men) scored in the highest range of satisfaction with their singlehood. Compared with single men, single women tended to say they were happier with their lives overall, happier about being single, happier with their sex lives, and – in a sign that singlehood was working better for women – that they were less interested in having a romantic partner. We also wondered if women being happier than men was unique to singles. Whereas single women were more content with their single status than single men were, we found that partnered women and men whom we surveyed were equally happy in their relationships. Overall, women – both single and partnered – reported higher general happiness levels than men did. It’s worth noting that consistent with past research, both men and women in relationships were happier than their single counterparts, on average. But it seems that, despite the negative historical pressures and stereotypes surrounding women’s singlehood, single women seem to be doing quite well after all. O ne potential reason why single women might tend to experience a happier singlehood has to do with their social support system, including their friends and family. It’s well established that strong social ties are an important factor in happiness, and they even seem to be one protective factor against an early death. Single people are no exception to the reality that social connections are a valuable part of a full life, singles often report that their relationships with friends, family, neighbours and acquaintances are important to their happiness. Heterosexual men tend to rely more exclusively on wives or girlfriends for emotional and social support. But the likelihood that one finds and keeps these connections is related to gender.
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